Funny Bone Tickled by Haiku

Here are 2 haiku jokes from the Haiku Comic.

Cross an elephant
and a kangaroo, you get
big holes down under.

A man got fired for
stealing from the slaughter house.
A pig squealed on him.

Sixth Anniversary

Hi Everyone,

Today marks the sixth anniversary of Dad's passing. In light of the economic crisis, Dad is better off spending eternity with his heavenly family. If Dad were alive, I can just hear his rant about all the money and time spent trying to get elected President of the United States. He'd say, 'They are all a bunch of crooks." Dad would also ask, "How are they going to pay for all that stuff?"(campaign promises). Dad lost confidence in our federal government when Kennedy died. He believed in the conspiracy theory. He refused to vote after John Kennedy's assassination. I don't believe John Kennedy would agree with that decision. I don't. I think voting is a privilege. However,the right to vote or not vote is protected by the Constitution.

Dad was quite a character. He made a lot of bad decisions in his life. But he was a straight talker, unlike many of today's public figures. I respect him for offering his customers the best products available. He sold them at a fair price. Dad was a persistent and creative business man; someone who liked to work and who did not want to retire. May he rest in peace.

autumn brings changes

Well things have turned cold, especially my feet. I am haveing a bad hair cut day. This women managed to give me a cow lick. Anybody got a hat I could barrow? ESB change their online banking. I spend all day trying to get help resetting up my stuff. It came down to don't put dashes between the numbers in your soc. sec. number. Who new? It's those little things that keep me going NUTS! Happy Halloween folks and I have the cow lick to prove it.

Boxing Match

I just called 911 (for the first time ever!) because there was a teenage boxing match going on in my neighborhood. It was a little frightening. I was out walking the dog, when I came upon a group of teenaged boys (some of whom I recognized) surrounding a couple of freshman/sophomore aged teens boxing (with real boxing gloves!) in the middle of the street. There were some younger boys watching and some older boys (whom I didn't recognize) watching and recording the "fight" on their cell phones. I didn't like the fact that these older boys seemed to have coaxed the slightly younger boys into fighting. They stopped as I walked by, and I said hello (didn't want to be uncordial). As I walked by the younger boys, I quietly said, "Be careful" so that only they could hear me.

When I got home, I called the HOA president, and she told me to call the police. So I did. Of course, the police transferred me three times (from one jurisdiction to another) before someone finally responded. Thank goodness it wasn't a real emergency!

I had been planning to take a long walk after walking the dog, but I decided to stay in this evening instead. I'd rather that I not run into any of those boys again so soon after my witnessing their boxing match. Since they were doing it right out in the open (on a different street from my home), perhaps they'll think that someone else called the cops.

Here I was, kind of enjoying having the house to myself, and now I feel a little spooked out. Darn it!

On another note, you'll probably notice that you have to sign in to access this blog now. I decided to make it private so that only we can view it. I hope that's okay with everyone.

I can't wait to see Honor, Beth, Jacob, Carol, Sharon, Margaret, and my folks this week! Perhaps I'll get to see Tom and Jesse too? I hope you all have a great week! Love ya and see you soon!

The New & Improved Granada Theatre

Last week the old Granada theatre here in Emporia had its ribbon cutting ceremony & this week is the first performance. The town has been working on restoring the old theatre for the last nine years & I have heard a lot of good things about the results. I actually was next door one morning last week getting a coffee & got to glimpse in while they were working on the doorway. What I saw looked amazing. The first performance is this Thursday, it is the Golden Dragon Acrobats. Thanks to Don Hill(for the tickets) & Carol(for watching Jacob) Peter & I will be enjoying the show. We are really looking forward to it. I think it will be a good stress reliever for Peter, who is having oral surgery the following morning. Some coworkers & I got to talking about the old theatre & it seemed I remember going to see movies there with my cousins when we were kids. Am I right or is my memory faulty? I will let you know how the show was, I'll have plenty of time on my hands while babysitting my drugged hubby on Friday. Yeah!

Congrats, Trent, on the new job opportunity!

Jacob can now say the complete alphabet on his own. He is an incredibly bright boy. He also knows his last name. I hope we can get a chance to see everyone soon.

Here It Is

Most of you probably know this by now, but ...

On Sept. 30, I accepted a position with the Department of Homeland Security (US Customs and Border Protection) to become a US Border Patrol Agent. I was offered Blythe, Calif., or Yuma, Ariz. I chose Yuma because a) it’s a bigger city (pop. 85,000) that offers more professional opportunities for Katie, b) it has an airport, and c) California taxes and cost of living aren’t friendly.

My Enter on Duty date is this Thursday in Yuma, at which time I will be sworn in, have an orientation, fill out HR paperwork, and tour the area. Next Monday, the government will fly me to Artesia, N.M., about 2½ hours northeast of El Paso, Texas, to begin an 11-week training program at the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center (FLETC). My graduation date is early January. Upon completion, I will likely stay an additional 8 weeks for Spanish training. (I know a lot of Spanish but am out of practice and by no means fluent in the language.)

According to my schedule, I should finish Spanish training in late February. At that time I should get 10-14 days to get everything squared away in Atlanta before officially beginning work along the Mexican border. (Of course, this is dependent on me not flunking out or getting injured while in Artesia.)

This move probably surprises (or even sounds downright crazy to) many of you, but it was not an irrational decision; it was five months in the making. I’ve always had an interest in law enforcement and the desire to do something for the greater good. One of my biggest regrets is not enlisting in the military after graduation of high school or college. This is my way of serving the country, on the front lines of homeland security. It is something I feel strongly about and at which I believe I will excel.

The Border Patrol finds an average of only one qualified candidate for every 30 to 40 applicants. I am one of those few qualified applicants, and this is an opportunity I can’t pass up. Katie understands and is being supportive, even if it means being away from her for a few months and walking away from her (really good) job and career. It also contradicts our desire to move back to the Midwest but, in 20 years, I don’t want to lament about not accepting this position.

Lastly, Artesia is on Mountain Standard Time, meaning I’ll be an hour behind most of you. My evenings and weekends will be free, though. If anyone wants to call or e-mail, the contact info is below. (I'll also post updates on the blog.)

Cell: 678-447-7025
e-mail: trentmason@bellsouth.net